Peering into the lives of the rich and spoiled has always been popular — and these days, the worse they act, the more we love them.
We are a nation of voyeurs, and our fixation with other people’s lives — both fictional and not — is often directed upward, to folks dripping with wealth, privilege and Botox. The best part? Those with the most often act with the least: that is, the least self-awareness, decorum and general connection to reality.
From unscripted reality shows like the Real Housewives franchise and The Kardashians to irresistible dramas like the current AppleTV+ hit Your Friends & Neighbors, starring Jon Hamm as an unemployed hedge fund manager who steals from his wealthy friends, and the HBO sensation The White Lotus, which focuses on the most cluelessly wealthy people ever, we are totally obsessed with rich people behaving badly.
That’s not new: “When there was a recession in the early ‘80s, shows like Dallas and Dynasty proved hugely popular,” Broadcast historian Finola Doyle has told Metro. “They were luxe and opulent. They were a form of escapism. There were fewer of those shows in the ‘90s and noughties, and more of a focus on gritty realism. The economy was performing better, so there wasn’t such a chasm.” Enter Swamp People, Here Comes Honey Boo Boo and Duck Dynasty, three reality shows The Hollywood Reporter called part of cable TV’s major “blue collar boom” back in 2013.
So, what’s happening now? Clinical psychologist Sarah Bishop tells Glamour, “In times of economic uncertainty, such as a cost-of-living crisis, people often seek escapism through media. Watching the privileged can trigger social comparison processes. People may feel better about their own lives when they observe the flaws and failures of the wealthy, as this reinforces the notion that happiness and success are not solely determined by wealth.” Meaning, a lot of us in ordinary towns with ordinary jobs and ordinary hair that just sort of hangs down instead of swishing sumptuously may never own a mansion in the Hamptons or sashay into a gorgeous beach resort in Sicily, but at least we’re not so miserable.
When the people on Badly Behaved Rich People shows scream, cry, brawl or throw a tantrum because they didn’t get the biggest room on vacation, it’s a welcome reminder that money can buy all the handbags, but not all the happiness.
Watching Housewives flaunt their money and make terrible choices gives us the thrill of feeling morally superior, even for just a minute, to people who technically have it all. When they mess up, it’s a delicious kind of justice — way tastier than caviar (at least, we imagine). Whether it’s passive-aggressive dinner parties or a meltdown in a mansion, we’re hooked on all the compelling chaos and, sometimes, cruelty behind those perfect blow-dries and infinity kitchen islands.
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And yet, despite these people’s lives often being way more of a disaster zone than our own, we still want to be a little more like them, too. As Zoe Williams of The Guardian says of White Lotus season 3 compared with its first, “It feels a lot more like early 21st-century wealth porn.” We’re disillusioned with wealth but still seduced by the fantasy.
The stats don’t lie: Style videos tagged “rich mom energy” have had over 100 million views and counting on TikTok and many clothing retailers optimize their products on Google for “rich mom fashion” search terms. And that makes perfect sense. Maybe still, deep down, we believe that if we could only access all that these obsessively watchable and chronically extra people have, we’d be better off.
